Ummm...

I just have to post about how disorganized our government can be. Vince just got a jury duty notice. Do they not check the disability records before sending these out? Now, it is up to us to call and explain that he cannot attend because he is disabled? I sure hope that is an excusable reason! This is crazy! Okay, just had to get that out :)


Update: I called the jury office and they said all they need to see is Vince's SSDI award letter and he will be excused. Whew!

I just sit in silence...

I sit out back of Vince's nephews new house as we celebrate with a housewarming party. It's 95 degrees out but there is a lot of trees of shade and a breeze and it was so peaceful. What a beautiful house and private yard to BBQ in! As Vince and I talk with one of his brothers, and a couple that stopped by from across the street, the pain starts, full force. Vince cringes in pain as I just sit there, staring at the ground with a blank look on my face. His brother asks him if he is okay and Vince just nods. I take a glance at the clock on my phone to see if he is due for a pain pill, and he is. Just as I am about to ask him if he wants some medicine, he asks me for his black bag. I am already out of my chair, and on the way to the car to retrieve it. Inside it, he carries his glucose meter and test strips, glucose tablets, alcohol wipes, and his pain medicine. I hand it to him and he takes a pill. The conversation continues amongst him and I and the others. Later in the evening as we talk about the day, the episode came up. It made me think. Why do I just sit in silence when he has an episode in front of people. I suppose it is because I know I can't do anything. What if I look at the others around us and continue talking? Will they wonder why I am not doing anything to help him? Do they realize there is nothing that anyone can do? Or maybe it's because I try not to show how sad it makes me to see him. Maybe by sitting there quietly, staring into space for those few seconds of extreme pain and shocks, I am just trying not to get emotional. I suppose it is all of the above.

Minimed Enlite Sensor

A fellow blogger told me about a new version of the minimed sensor called Enlite. It is supposed to be easier to insert than the current sensor for the minimed CGM. After researching it, it seems that it is not yet available in the US. Here's to hoping that it will come soon! It is inserted at a 90 degree angle instead of the 45 degree angle of the current sensor which would make for easier, more comfortable insertion. I have to say, as much as we LOVE Vince's Minimed Revel pump and sensor, it took some time getting used to the sensor and knowing it's quarks. But it goes without saying, we LOVE it nonetheless!!

Made to the weekend! Whew!

I have been looking forward to my weekends very much so lately. I have not been sleeping too well due to Vince being in pain at night along with blood sugar lows at the same time. I am feeling very overwhelmed and not getting good sleep is not helping the situation. Vince has also been having a hard time with his nausea caused from one of his medications which is making him even more miserable. I finally called the doctor about it and he suggested weaning him down a bit to see if that helps. Of course, this is the one medication, aside from the pain meds, that helps him, so we don’t want to wean him down too much. We have tried cutting his morning dose in half since his nausea is worse during the day and that has helped that past few days, so we will continue that for now.
 
Vince and I have started seeing a therapist to help each of deal with the stress we are under. I feel like I complain a lot. Well, I have a lot to complain about, but when I vent to others, I feel like I am just complaining and I don’t like that. We have seen the therapist once so far and explained what each of us would like to work on. We will probably only see her once every two weeks or so. I really think this will help Vince as well as myself in all that we are dealing with, but I personally need more venting time than once every two weeks. We had to chuckle a bit at our appointment. When making the appointment, they assumed we wanted to be seen separately and I had to explain that we wanted to be seen together. It wasn’t until we were both in the office that they realized that our marriage wasn’t the issue and what was causing the problems. In fact, despite it all, as I always say, we get along great! We are both just having some trouble dealing with the stress that each of us have on both sides of the situation. Between caring for Vince, working full time, and worrying about our finances, I am just wiped out and tired. I try to take on as much as I can because Vince does all he can just to deal with the excruciating pain day after day. The therapist actually made a point that neuropathic pain is the worst chronic pain you can have. Vince just shook his head and agreed and I thought in my head how horrible this is. I just want it to go away!
 
I have been trying to take more time for myself although it is not easy for me to want to get away. I feel like I am gone so much during the week and I hate to leave Vince sitting home on the weekends too, just so I can have me time, although I know it is needed. I have been getting my nails done about once a month which takes about an hour or two so I don’t feel too guilty or worry too much while I am there. The place I go to get the manicure and pedicure is so relaxing and so nice. Granted, I hate spending an extra $30 a month to relax but it is worth it to clear my mind for a day.

Feeling a little dumb at the moment...

Okay, I admit it. I had no idea about sugar alcohol. I have not asked Vince about it yet, but I will have to see if he is aware of it. I googled it and I think I understand it to be a type of sugar that is absorbed less...? so now it seems that even sugar free has sugar in it? I am a little confused...I think we might just get the oreos from now on... :)