Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Happy New Year

It’s been a little crazy lately with the new year and new insurance changes. I tried to prepare for the changes as much as possible, but that didn’t stop it from getting a little hectic for us. Three of Vince’s medications were no longer being covered, so we had to plan and figure out the next best thing for him. The only one that I was really stressing about was his 24 hour pain medication. The issue was that we had to find out from the doctor what other medication might work for him. That was the easy part. Then I had to find a pharmacy to get it from. Anyone who needs pain medication knows it is not the easiest to find in stock at any pharmacy. Due to the old medication coming to an end on a Saturday, we had to get the new medication ordered and filled before then so that he didn’t go without. It was a little stressful, but thanks to his brother helping me while I was stuck at work, we were able to get the medication ordered and picked up. Once he started the new medication, there was a bit of a transition period. His pain spiked quite a bit for a few days, but it seemed to settle back down once the old medication was out of his system and the new was in.

We are still seeing our therapist, however we have shifted to about once a month or so. He is awesome!! He totally understands us, and help us to remember to always do what is best for US. Sometimes it is hard for me to remember that one. Do what is best for us. It’s Vince and I against the world! I am a big people pleaser. That gets hard. Especially when you have as much going on as I do. I can’t please everyone, as much as I try. So having someone to remind me to always take care of me and Vince first and foremost is great.

We also continue to lean on the people around us. Vince’s one brother, Walt, continues to be a tremendous person and one Vince (and I) can count on for support whenever needed. Just knowing he thinks of us often is so great. His other brother John has also been great lately as well. Also, my good friend and ‘2nd Mom’ Barb continues to be there for me without fail. She amazes me and I don’t know what I would do without her there to keep me going and show me that it will always be okay.

Same Same

Ever meet someone that was just like you in a certain way, and you just click, like you have known each other for years?

This is kind of what it is like to meet other spouses of Type 1’s. Last year I met a local woman about my age who is married to a Type 1 Diabetic. We live about an hour away from each other but have managed to meet up for lunch to talk, visit, and vent to each other. The first time we met, it felt like we knew each other for years! There was no awkwardness during the first meeting. It was like she knew what I live with and I knew the same for her. We then met up with the hubby’s for lunch a few months later and the four of us, again, got along like old friends. We ‘talked’ the same language.

About a month ago, I was contacted by a student in NYC doing her doctoral dissertation on spouses of Type 1 Diabetics. She found me through my blog and asked if she could interview me. Of course I was happy to meet her. She herself happened to be a spouse of a Type 1 as well! Again, once we met, we talked and chatted like old friends who completely understood each other and each other’s lives. It was amazing. We made plans to keep in touch.

It is so exciting to meet other spouses. They understand what it is like to be woken up by the CGM throughout the night. They understand why I call Vince throughout the day to ‘check in on him’ They get it! They get me!

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Trying To Keep It All Up

I am stressed. To the max. Again. It’s never ending. I am tired. Mentally and physically.

Very few people understand what I have on my plate. Some understand more than others. Some think they understand, but they really don’t.

Some think they understand, and actually do. But that list is very short.

I don’t want pity. I don’t want people to feel sorry for me. What I do want is for people to understand why I am tired. Why I have a short fuse. Why I over react and flip out over little things. I want them to understand my life so that they understand me. Understand us.

I work 40 hours a week. I keep a house going. Cook, clean, pay bills, and worry how we are going to keep going financially week to week and make it through another month. I make doctor appointments for Vince and myself. I keep track of all the appointments and make sure I have off work to get Vince there. I order medications and keep track of the inventory at our home. I worry and stress about how we will pay for them. I make endless phone calls regarding appointments, medications, and health insurance changes or issues. I am a full time employee at work 40 hours a week, but I am also a full time care giver at home 24/7. I am needed to help Vince with his mental wellbeing to keep his spirits up and keep him positive, as well as his physical wellbeing. I have to help him get dressed. I administer all of his shots and change out his insulin pump sites. On the rare occasion we get to go out to a restaurant, if he forgets his reading glasses, I have to read the menu to him. I don’t get a break. I don’t get to run away. I have to balance being a wife with being a care giver and not forgetting that I am a wife too.

When I get really stressed and worrisome, I like to sleep. Because well, when I sleep, I can rest my mind and forget about all this that I have on my plate. But that doesn’t always work. I am awoken more often than not AT LEAST once a night to help Vince. Whether he needs help getting to bed because the drowsiness of his medications, or he needs help because of a low sugar episode, or maybe he is in a lot of extra pain and needs help doing something. Sometimes he even falls in the middle of the night. His balance isn’t the greatest anymore due to the Neuropathy so add in the medicated drowsiness and this can get very tough for him; like getting to the bathroom or to the bedroom.

But I’m not complaining. Really, I’m not. I am just tired. Worn out. Exhausted from trying to balance life as a 29 year old who is young and wants desperately to have a family but in reality has to take care of a sick husband because that is the one person she loves more than life itself and can’t imagine giving up on him.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

3rd Annual JDRF Walk

Below are pictures from our walk this year. The Sugar Free Floyd's exceeded our fundraising goal for JDRF!

Team Sugar Free Floyds
From left to right: Vince, me, Melissa, Adam, Walt, Rich, Brooke, Zach, Mom, Chris, Karen, Violet, Rory, Brian, and Kayla

 Vince and I

Adam and Melissa

Vince and Walt

Zach and Brooke

Chris and Mom

We were towards the end of the line. Look at all those people!

Tyler State Park, Newtown PA. Beautiful day!

Tyler State Park, Newtown PA. Beautiful day!

JDRF Funds at work!

I loved the back of this walk teams t-shirts!

At first I thought this was Medtronic's Lenny the Lion, but I believe this was a random person dressed up. It was pretty funny though.

Friday, October 25, 2013

Magazine Appearance

Here are a few pictures from the article on diabetes complications that Vince was interviewed for Diabetes Forecast Magazine. It was a big self esteem booster for him and I am very proud!